Sweet Pictures

A fellow EN mom, Deidre, sent us these pictures. What a wonderful blessing! My younger sister was teasing me about having friends "on-line". She knows I would be the last one in our family to do anything electronic - I dislike gadgets. :) I sold my food processor and my electric can opener at a garage sale.

Pictures of our dear little fellow are definitely a benefit of the time I spend reading others blogs and working on mine. The prayers that are sent on Nathan's behalf are also most definitely a gift!

So without further ado....Nathan with a fellow EN friend.


How about that HAIR?!

Maybe he was looking at the family pictures we sent. :)



Thank you so much Deidre! We can't wait to hold close our little boy!

Praying for PA!

The Lord delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love. Psalm 147:11

We heard today that we have been "kicked out" of PGN (final court) for not having pre-approval (PA) from our Embassy. The Embassy has the DNA results, now we wait. After we receive PA we will be re-submitted to PGN. (Note:we expected this.)

I look at this as good news - they have looked at our case and things are moving in Guatemala!

Please pray with us for a speedy Pre-approval so we can get on with this journey. We are so ready to bring him home!

4 Months Old

Nathan is four months old today. This is such a fun age, (though each age has fun built in), when he will start to notice even more around him, make more noises, play with more objects. It would be such a neat time to be with Nathan; to see his response to his family. But that isn't where the Lord has placed him at the moment.

Right now he has his EN family to care for him. We are so thankful for his children's home. We know he will be well cared for until it is time for him to come home to his forever family. Not that we don't yearn for those days, but there is comfort in knowing that the Lord has His hand upon little Nathan's life.

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines
his steps."
Proverbs 16:9

A Blessed Christmas to You All

A quote from our pastor:

"Wise men still seek Him, and when they seek Him they find Him, and when they find Him they worship Him." May you seek, find, and worship the Lord in the coming days.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas!

My daughter came upon this in one of her classes-enjoy!



12/18/07-DNA is a match! Praying the Embassy is energized by the holiday spirit! Bring on the Pre-Approval!

Let the Little Children Come

He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Mark 10:14

I am in awe of God's faithfulness. We have friends who are getting ready to travel to Columbia to meet their three children. They have faithfully followed the Lord through this long journey. Three Guatemala adoptive families have recently been released from PGN, their children will soon be coming home.

Thank you Lord for watching over these children as they wait for their families to come to them. May their hearts be open to the spiritual training these families will bring to them. May they come to know you at a tender age and follow you all of their days. Amen.

And Jesus grew in wisdom, and stature, and in favor with God and man.

Luke 2:52

Short update: Our birthmom had to re-take her DNA, the original sample was not large enough to test. This has been done. We are waiting on results which will then go to the embassy to await pre-approval. We were told that we were to be submitted to PGN last week. Thank you for lifting Nathan and our family up in prayer.

Say Cheese!

Each year our Christmas picture is a great adventure. This year we decided to take one on our front porch. The beginnings reminded me of the Christmas picture being taken at the beginning of Cheaper by the Dozen- but then everyone started warming up to the idea. It took us a while-we were using the delay on the camera on a tripod. (Ken wanted to call our good friend and neighbor to take it, but why do it the easy way.) So I thought I would share some for fun, some of them show some of our true personalities. It was really a lot of fun.

Natalie waiting patiently. She is growing up too fast.

Sophie (our dog) thought all the merriment was for her, so she kept trying to get in the picture. When we actually tried to get her to sit for the picture she didn't want any part of it.

Things are starting to get a little crazy, think we better get a good shot quickly.

Celebrating that we are done!

Christmas 2007

Merry Christmas from our family to yours! May the Lord bless you greatly in the New Year!

"Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; He is Christ the Lord." Luke 2:11

December Update

Nathan looks a little bored here with the whole picture-taking thing.

I love to recieve the new pictures each month and see how Nathan's personality is developing. It makes me more ready to get to know him in person.

Here he seems to want to say something.

He's precious to us either way!

He currently weighs 10#5oz. and is 22 inches long. We are continuing to thank the Lord for His hand in Nathan's adoption.

"And whoever welcomes a child like this in my name welcomes me." Matthew 18:5

News Update

We received some good news today and really an answer to what we have been praying. We heard today that not only has our Social Work interview been completed but that we are out of Family Court. They are planning on submitting us to PGN this week, without pre-approval (so eventually we will get kicked out-this is normal) This is very good news and a much larger step than we had anticipated.

This calls for another short video clip of the cuddliest little boy- we hope to welcome him home soon! Thank you Angel for being such an angel to our family. :)

Nathan Live!

A blogging Angel, and a fellow Gautemama visited the Children's Home in early November. We received some video clips from her. The more I watch him the more my heart is ready to bring him home! He is a beautiful child and we are excited to get to know him and love him!

This past week we were all piling into the van and as I was counting heads I thought, "someone is missing", but there were 6 kiddos there. I have attempted to keep my heart protected through this process, but Nathan is embedding himself there anyway. That's okay, there is room for him, too. :)

Sleeping Like a Baby

All tucked in and sleeping like a baby.

We received these pictures this evening so I thought I would share them. Nathan looks very secure tucked in his blanket. Deidre said she had tried to arouse him to open his eyes for the picture but he was sleeping soundly.

I have always loved to watch my kids sleep. To this day I still check on each one at night and watch them breathe.

Children are precious. I can hardly wait until I can check on Nathan sleeping snuggly in his bed at home. Praying that the Lord would bring Nathan home soon. Deidre, thank you for the sweet pictures and the covering of prayer.

November 28 - Nathan is 3 months old :)

A Blessing from a Friend!

Children are a blessing from the Lord...even when they are far away.

We pray that Nathan would know that he is loved. Today the person that took these pictures told me that she had told Nathan that his family loved him. An answer to our prayer!

God is so good!

UPDATE: DNA was completed this morning, Nov.19. :)

Our Cutie Petutie!

Part of my heart is in Guatemala. It is such a blessing to get new pictures each month. He is sure a cutie petutie!

Weight: 8# 4oz.

Height: 20 1/2 inches

He is doing great!

UPDATE: We heard that we received DNA Authorization today (11/15). We were told it should be done next week.

I am Thankful For....

**A gracious heavenly Father who adopted me into His family, "while I was yet a sinner".

**A wonderful husband who lives out his faith every day, and whose heart embraces not only our family but beyond.

**For our children, both those with us, those in heaven, and those yet to come. Children are truly a blessing from the Lord.

**God's provision for a home.

**God's provision for our adoption of Nathan.

**For that matter, God's provision daily for ALL of our needs.

**For our dog, who some days is just an animal and other days a trusted friend.

**For wonderful friends that share my burdens and whose burdens I help to hold.

**For opportunities to see the Lord's hand at work in my life and those of my children.

**I am thankful for a church that is committed to sharing the truth of scripture.

**I am thankful for my mom, dad, and siblings. And for Ken's family who have added so much to our lives.

I could go on, but I will stop there. Sometimes as we wait to bring Nathan home I lose sight of all that I have today to be thankful for. I don't want to miss the present waiting for the future. God has set the time that Nathan will come home, I choose today to trust the Lord for His timing.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Update: We heard today that Nathan's paperwork has been corrected and received by the attorney. This is an answer to prayer and good news, too. :)

Check it Out!

Next week there will be a series of radio broadcasts concerning adoption.

Check out: http://cryoftheorphan.org/ to get the whole scoop and broadcast schedule. There is sure to be something for every family, no matter where your heart is in relation to orphan care.

"Open your heart for the mute, for the rights of all the unfortunate. Open your mouth, judge righteously, and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy."
Proverbs 31:8-9

May you be greatly encouraged during this next week!

"...and let us consider how we can spur one another on towards love and good deeds..."
Hebrews 10:24

Praying for the children of Guatemala,
Amy

Who are the Orphans in Your Neighborhood?

I wrote this post a while ago but never posted it, today I thought I should send it out. :)

Who are the orphans in your neighborhood? in your neighborhood,they're in your neighborhood? Who are the orphans in your neighborhood, are they the people that you meet when you're walking down the street? They may be the people that you meet each day. (Okay, for you Mister Rogers people, I took a little bit of "creative" license with this song-sorry).

This is a question that has been on my heart for a while. By definition an orphan is "a child who has lost one or both parents by death". To be orphaned is "to be deprived of one or both parents."

Living in the midwest it feels as if there aren't very many orphans. But the more I think about this the more I see.

Our two older kids help at a Good News Club nearby where approximatley 40%(I don't remember the exact number) of the children have at least one parent in prison. Some of them are temporarily orphaned. I have good friends who, as adults, have seen both of their parents go home to be with the Lord. While they are adults, they sometimes feel like orphans; they don't have a parent to call for advice or wisdom. Foster children are orphaned for a time. Though they are placed with a loving foster family, they are our society's orphans for a time. For many reasons, there is an overwhelming number of single parents in our culture. Some of these children are missing either a father or a mother.

What is unique about each of these people? They have unique needs that we can all reach out to help with. How am I going to help? That is the question I wrestle with.

I think the first step is to pray. Ask the Lord how I can be of service to Him in these people's lives. We have a large family, our time is crowded, but it also means that we have many arms to reach out with. :) I don't think it is an issue of "if" we reach out, but "where" are we going to reach?

I Will Put My Trust in Him

I am in Hebrews for my devotions right now. I like to really mull it over in my mind, so I go s-l-o-w. This morning I was reading in Hebrews 2,(told you I go slow), and as I read verse 13 stuck in my mind. Because of all that we are told before this verse in Hebrews we are able to "put our trust in Him".

I often talk about trusting the Lord for this adoption. And I do seek to do that daily, sometime moment-by-moment, but I often have thoughts in my head of a back-up plan. But if I have a back-plan, am I really trusting the Lord to bring us through this? That is something I am also mulling over.

By nature I am a problem-solver, as a woman and a mom these are probably things that help me in my daily life but it also makes me more prone to rely on myself rather than on God or others who offer help.

God is showing me through this adoption that I still have a ways to go to really trust in Him, and it is my heart's desire to trust Him fully.

When I got around to checking my email this morning there was a note from our agency. Seems there was an error on the hospital paperwork which caused a discrepancy with Nathan's birth certificate. It is supposed to be fixed and back to the attorney tomorrow. So here I go...."I will put my trust in him".

Secondly, an email led me to guatadopt.com which is giving news of Guatemala's intention to delay the implementation of the Hague until April 1, 2008. This is good news! So here I go..."I will put my trust in him."

This is our third adoption, the first one internationally-some things are universal with adoptions. While it seems that people are in control of the circumstances it truly is the Lord who has full control. So here I go..."I will put my trust in him."

And again, "I will put my trust in him." Hebrews 2:13

We consider precious Nathan our son, though not legally at this point, he is imprinted in our hearts. We are continuing to pray him home.

See update on "I Am Thankful for..." post.

Patience

We are waiting for an update on Nathan's case and praying that when it comes it shows some progress toward Nathan's adoption. Today a blogging friend went to the children's home on a missions trip and took a care package down for us-Thank you Angel! Rock Nathan gently for us.

I have now been to Houston with my mom to meet with the doctor at MD Anderson Cancer Center. We are waiting to hear from the doctor on Tuesday as to what they determine to be her treatment plan.

My hope is that I can be the support that my mom needs now as she has been such a support to me. She has been a great sounding board, listener, cheerleader, friend.... I wish my dad could be here to walk her through this valley, mom did such a wonderful job of caring for dad when he was ill.

Sometimes I am not sure I have the courage to walk my mom through this, though I know that when I am weak the Lord's strength will hold me up,(actually the only time I am strong is because of the Lord). My mom's faith will sustain her on days when she feels weak. I pray that the Lord would be her refuge, strength and comfort as we go through this uncertain time.

"God is our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging." Psalm 46:1-3

As I write this I realize that we are patiently waiting in two very important areas for two very different things. For Nathan: we wait patiently to bring him home and in this wait we hope the news comes soon. For my mom: we are patiently waiting for news, hoping that bad news never comes. The best news is that both of these waits are in the Lord's hands and we can trust Him totally with Nathan and Mom.

Nathan is 2 Months Old!

Today Nathan is 2 months old! Time is flying by, though at times it seems like it is dragging. We are so thankful that Nathan is healthy and growing. It is our desire that he comes home to us as soon as possible.

Dear Lord, We pray that Nathan would continue to grow and develop. We ask that he would know that he is loved. Please guard his little heart that as he grows he would be sensitive to things of the Lord and would grow in wisdom, stature, and in favor with God and man. May you allow him to come home to us soon.
In Jesus Name, Amen

Nesting

Yes, I'm nesting-waaay too early. Keeping busy keeps my mind busy. It also gives me a great sense of accomplishment! While I really can't attribute this sudden burst of energy to Nathan coming home soon, it does help me be prepared if the Lord would see fit to speed his adoption through. :)

More than likely, the real source of my energy comes from the ending of Allison's tennis season (the team finished 2nd in our conference) and Natalie and Molly completing soccer-Natalie's team won the consolation round of the final tournament. It is great to be home in the evenings as a family and to feel that we have some margins in our time!

Tonight for fun at dinner we each answered the question, "How would you spend a million dollars?" Brandon went first. Brandon's reply, "I'd buy a cookie, a funnel cake,and a diet Pepsi(a boy after his mom's heart). He's four. It was fun for everyone to dream for a short time.

We do our family devotions at dinner and end with everyone praying. It encourages my heart to hear our children pray for their little brother far away. It is our prayer that Nathan would know that he is loved and prayed for, that the Lord would shine down upon him, and that he would come home soon!

[The green color seemed more appropriate for a little boy] :)

Waiting...

We are waiting.... Waiting to hear any news regarding Nathan's case, waiting to see what Guatemala will do, and waiting for an appointment for my mom at MD Anderson (we should hear about the last one today). Waiting is okay most days, some things are worth waiting for! Other things we wish weren't even an issue (my mom's cancer).

So while we are waiting, I've been tagged. So...


Jobs I've Had
Wendys
Small Bakery
Mail-order company
Insurance Company
Oncology Nurse
Home Health Nurse
Family Practice Nurse


Places I've Lived
Joliet,IL
Sparland
Peoria
East Peoria
Morton

Foods I Love
Pizza
Chinese
Suzy-Q's
Diet Pepsi
A crisp Jonathan apple on a fall day

Places I'd Rather Be
Guatemala!
Door County,WI
Alaska

Books I Love
Bible
Little Women
Books by Dee Henderson

I'm Tagging
Julie

blip!

There was a blip in our process today as we received word that part of our son's name was missing on his POA. We quickly rectified that and sent it off. I was thinking that I could obsess about this, and try to figure out the time lost in our case, or I could simply choose to trust the Lord for His hand to be upon Nathan.

This next week I am teaching 4th grade Sunday School. The lesson is Matthew 8:5-13, about the faith of the centurion. He told Jesus that He didn't need to go to his home, all He had to do was say so and his servant would be healed (and he was healed). While I do not have the 'astonishing' faith of the centurion-I do know that we worship the Lord of all creation, and that He is able to speak and things happen.

I am trusting the Lord to go before us in this process, knowing that He is in control. The Lord has brought us to a place where we need to trust in Him. He holds Nathan in His hands, and I am so thankful for that. Nathan is the Lord's child and we are asking that we be able to love and care for him. I know that the Lord hears our prayers and that He will answer as He sees fit. My job in this is to trust the Lord with all my heart (Proverbs 3:5-6), and give Him all the praise and the glory He deserves.

Our desire is to delight ourselves in the Lord throughout this adoption.

"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

Praying for all the children of Guatemala, Amy

Always Fun to Get New Pictures

Our entire family looks forward to new pictures, they are barely visible and someone is asking to have a print of them. Nathan Rodolfo is growing and healthy and we are so thankful for that! He weighs 6 pounds, 7 ounces and he is a cutie!

Nathan, we are praying for you and desire for you to come home to us.
You are truly a precious gift from God.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6

Spinning Out of Control?

Sometimes it feels that things are spinning out of control. Yesterday my mom found out that her cancer has returned with a vengeance, requiring a trip to M.D.Anderson for some type of treatment. We got a call last night that Ken's mom had been hospitalized but was doing better. And yesterday Guatemala took a step to put into process a law that, unless amended, may make it difficult to get our little boy and thousands of other "in-process" children home to their forever families. It feels at times like things are spinning out of control.

I find great comfort in knowing that the Lord who created the universe, placing the stars in the sky, is in control of all things. Yes, all things.

"God made two great lights--the greater light to govern the day
and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars.
God set them in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth."
Genesis 1:16-17

Honestly, this could be a discouraging time (that may be an understatement) if I kept my mind on all the difficulties. I am working at trusting the Lord and keeping my focus on Him, taking the days one at a time. Scripture is so good to provide ways for me to keep my mind on Him. I desire the "perfect peace" that I can only find in the Lord.

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you." Isaiah 26:3

My desire through this time is to glorify the Lord, because it is only through Him that we are not close to despair. May my reactions show others my love for the Lord. If you feel so inclined you could pray for our family and the families of the thousands of other children in Guatemala that are waiting. Please pray for me to be the support that my mom and siblings need as we see what lies ahead.

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting
away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen
is eternal." II Corinthians 4:16-18

So, while I feel a little woozy with all of this, I am assured that nothing has spun out of the Lord's control.

Sometimes Moms Need to Laugh

Sometimes it is good to take a break from the serious things in life and just laugh. (My older sister sent me this.) Enjoy!

Priorities

Sundays are busy days in our home, actually that is probably every day. I recently have heard myself say "it's crazy" in reference to our schedule a few too many times. My goal this week is to lessen the "craziness" and focus more on the Lord.

There are some things in our schedule I can't change. I can make sure, however, that my priorities are in the right order. I am the best mom I can be when I start my day in the Word and in prayer. For that matter, I'm the best I can be at just about everything I do when I am disciplined in my Christian walk. The longer I know the Lord the more I see how far I have to go in my Christian life and I want to run my race to the finish and do it well.

We serve a God who is Holy and blameless (He has a myriad of other attributes, as well). He is worthy of us giving our best to Him daily!

In Franklin Graham's book, The Name he said, "We contemplate what He gave on the cross--His life. But you see, Jesus gave His life every day in His Father's Name. Should we do any less?"

If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take
up his cross daily, and follow me. Luke 9:23

Why Guatemala?

Why would we choose to adopt from Guatemala? The quick answer would be that Guatemala was the country that the Lord laid on our hearts. But there is more to it than that.

Guatemala is close as far as airline flights are concerned. You can travel there in a day and the expense is not outrageous. We looked ahead and wondered if the child we brought into our family would one day want to return to Guatemala for a visit or perhaps even to live. It really is a little selfish on our part, we wanted to be able to visit them should they choose to return to their home country.

Another reason we chose Guatemala was because of the Children's Home that we had come to learn about. We saw their mission, not just for the children of Guatemala but the whole of Guatemala. We all have the same great need - The Lord! The founders of this Children's Home desire to share the gospel with all the people of Guatemala, partially through outreach and church planting.

Of course, travel required to Guatemala as you adopt was a factor as well. Some countries require you to stay for two weeks or more and with a family already at home this is more difficult.

But, ultimately, the "quick answer" is the real reason we chose to adopt from Guatemala. The Lord laid the children of Guatemala on our hearts.
As things seem to be heating up with the politics of the Hague treaty it is the Lord that we are leaning on. The Lord has led us to this spot in life and we desire to trust Him as we wait and pray for Nathan to come home to us.

I wrote a letter yesterday to an official and put it in my "draft" file. I prayed about it and thought about what should be the right response to the DOS(Department of State) news lately. As I thought about Christ's ministry I saw that He was a man of action. So I decided to send my letter. I also sent a couple of other emails. Ken and I will continue to bring before the Lord in prayer the children of Guatemala, the decisions being made over the next three months do not just affect us, they affect all of the orphans in Guatemala.

"And whoever welcomes a child like this in my name welcomes me." Matthew 18:5

A Time for Everything

There is truly a time for everything and most of all everything is in the Lord's timing. This morning Ken's dad went home to be with the Lord, he was 84 years old. Glen had struggled with Alzheimer's disease in the last couple of years and really had not known for a while that he was with us.

I have known Glen for 19 years and know that he is fully healed today and praising the Lord. We will miss him. He was a man of God, disciplined in spending time with the Lord and in prayer. He had lived a full life and had spent many years in service to the Lord.

I am so grateful to Glen for the way he raised up his family. The godly example that he showed to his family has been priceless. I am so thankful for the molding he did in Ken's life. His example has helped to make Ken a wonderful, tender, loving husband and a great dad! Thank you Glen for staying close to the Lord all of your years.

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace." Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

A Steve Green moment....

I drove to Springfield today to have our new POA authenticated. On the way home Brandon and Molly were asleep in their seats and I was enjoying some music. This song came on the radio:

The Plan (sung by Steve Green)

(chorus)
I don’t need to have the plan in hand,
I don’t need to have the end in sight,
All I need to do is follow you,
wherever you lead and do what you ask me to. (repeat)

Trusting you, Lord, with all my heart,
following you all my days;
whether I can or can’t understand,
I’ll acknowledge you in all my ways. (chorus)

Though I am pressed on every side I am not in despair.
My faith in you will carry me through though
I may not see where You’re leading me. (chorus)


I had just mailed off this very important piece of paper and it hit me that this child was truly in the Lord's hands. Nathan Rodolfo's plan is truly of the Lord's making. We are willing to follow the Lord in this area and we have certainly put our hearts in the Lord's hands and into this adoption. I seek to daily trust Him for Nathan's safekeeping and homecoming.

As a sidenote: I would highly recommend a Steve Green concert. We have been to two in the past and have enjoyed the music and the worship.

(I couldn't resist the picture, he is such a cutie!)

Celebrations Everywhere!

We are in midst of a fall festival in our hometown, it seems the whole place comes to life. But little compares to the joy of hearing of our referral! We would like to introduce to you ...

Nathan Rodolfo

"God's Gift" to our family

He was born on August 28th, which was Natalie's 10th birthday. Natalie had prayed that we get our referral on her birthday. I asked if she minded sharing her birthday and she said a resounding "no".

Ken has been gone on business and phoned very late last night saying he thought we should name him "Nathan". The neat thing is that Nathan was the name we had chosen to give our eldest child, Allison, if she had been a boy. The Lord knew we would need that name at a later time.

He is a beautiful child and we are rejoicing in the blessing that the Lord has brought our way!

Matthew 18:5

"And whoever welcomes a child like this in my name welcomes me." Matthew 18:5

I was running an errand for a friend this afternoon when my cell phone rang. It was our oldest son, Joel, telling me that when I got home I needed to call the agency back because we had a referral! He was a little excited. [Joel asked me yesterday after school if they had called yet-did he think I wouldn't tell him? :)] Well since I was driving away from home I called from the car. Amazingly I held it together as I heard the news while driving down the interstate-I wouldn't recommend this. I then had to call Ken who is out of town until tomorrow to tell him the news.

We are at the beginning of a long journey, but we know that we can trust the Lord to guide us as we go and we are ever so grateful for that. Please pray that we would wait patiently as we go through the process of bringing our son home.

Adoption Benefits

There are many benefits that come with adoption, some are more obvious than others. (They are not necessarily in order of importance.)

The most obvious benefit is the child that becomes a part of your family forever. Recently Molly(6) came and sat by me with her Bible and asked, "Mom, do you know why I am reading my Bible?". I said, "no". She replied, "Because the song we sang in Sunday School said if we didn't read our Bible we would shrink!". What a blessing to see Molly putting into practice what she is learning about the Lord.

A second benefit was that going through the process of adoption has each time brought Ken and I closer together. As we have gone through the bumps, interruptions, delays together we share a bond that grows stronger.

Thirdly, our relationship with the Lord is strengthened. Because so much in adoption is out of our control, we have to trust the Lord more fully. We trust that He loves and cares for the particular child more perfectly than we will ever be able to. We trust that every day in that child's and our own lives were written down before we were born-nothing that comes about is a surprise to Him.

Fourth, adoption has shown us the open hearts of our children. With older children in our family I sometimes wonder what they "really" think about another child in our home. Allison (17) is busy looking at colleges and mentioned one day that she wasn't sure about going too far away for college because she wanted to be able to be a part of our younger children's lives as they grew. And if that doesn't warm my heart as a mom this did... Joel (14) was talking about our family and said, "When we all have families our family get-togethers are going to be awesome!"

Fifth, adoption has opened my eyes to the grace of God in my life. As we have met many people intimately involved in our adoptions I have come to realize that if the Lord was not directing my path the path I would have taken may have been quite different. Sometimes it is a seemingly small turn that sends us in a different direction.

I could go on but I will leave you with this sixth benefit of adoption. Adoption gives our family a daily reminder of what the Lord has done for us by adopting us into His family. He takes each of us with all of our imperfections (sin) and cleanses us from the inside, inviting us into His family forever. Wow!

False Start

It was a little discouraging to get this news today. We were to have received an official referral today, but instead were told that the birth family had changed their minds and were picking the child up from the children's home today. It has been our prayer since we heard of this child that the birth family would have a peace about their decision, they did not.

I asked Ken today what he thought we were supposed to be learning from this process and he simply replied, "patience". So we are continuing to pray for the Lord's perfect timing in this adoption. We also pray that we will glorify the Lord throughout this journey. He is walking us through this time and He is worthy to be praised!

(I think I received today another small glimpse into how the Lord feels when He draws one of His children to Himself and they turn away.)

"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I put my hope. Psalm 130:5

(9/7) As I have had a chance today to mull these events over I am again reminded that I have to simply trust the Lord, that is what He is teaching me. He is reminding me that He is trustworthy!

Labor Day

We are waiting on word from our agency about our referral. We were told last week that it would be any moment. With a long weekend ahead of us we had to find something to do, so we started a small project. Well, maybe not so small. Ken and Joel started Saturday tearing out all of the landscaping in the front of our home and we finished the job today along with adding some new plantings. We still have a ways to go, but we are off to a great start!

The younger kids rode bikes and rollerbladed all over while we worked. We will all sleep well tonight, which is a blessing because maybe tomorrow is the BIG day! We are so looking forward to hearing who the Lord will be bringing to our family! We know that whoever he/she is we will be very excited to get to know them and the Lord will bless all of us through this journey.

Oh, and Molly lost her first tooth!

Update: No news today (9/4), but keep praying. :)
Update: A little news (9/5), more should come tomorrow. Praying for the Lord's guidance. :)

Bungee Jumping

No, that picture is not me, but it is how my emotions feel. I have often described adoption as an emotional roller coaster but today I feel like I am more of a bungee jumper. Yesterday I was pretty discouraged, and really had to spend some time with the Lord about the way I felt. In some ways I try to run ahead of the Lord and in other ways I plod slowly behind dragging my feet. I do find comfort in the fact that regardless of my emotions the Lord is able to be my rock and my refuge. Again the Lord is showing me His unchanging nature.

"The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge." Psalm 18:2

Seasons

I have often heard people talk about "seasons in life". Right now it feels that we are in several seasons at once. They all stretch me in ways I know I can only handle while I walk with the Lord.

We are in the season of waiting when it comes to our adoption. We are waiting for a new referral after the loss of Grace. It could be any day!

"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I put my hope." Psalm 130:5

We are in a season of milestones. Among our children, as school starts, we have a new preschooler, a kindergarden student, a freshman in high school and a senior in high school. As a mom each of these points in life brings a few tears. Which ones create the most tender spots? One would be the kindergardener, she seemed so brave as she took her seat and our chatterbox was a little subdued. Also, our senior, for I know that this will be the last school year that I will hear all her thoughts as they need to pour out at 11pm, among many other things. We so enjoy Allison, she is truly a gift from the Lord. Our desire is that our children would grow closer to the Lord throughout this school year and see His hand in their lives.

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps." Proverbs 16:9

Lastly we are in a season of busy-ness. Our two youngest girls are playing soccer and our oldest plays tennis. We are very much in divide and conquer mode. Each of the girls has a blast playing these sports but they do take up much of our time. There are many life-lessons learned from playing sports and many opportunities, both as an onlooker and a participant, to learn humility and to honor the Lord.

"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." Romans 12:10

I am so thankful that the Lord does not change as my life does. His unchanging nature allows me to hold tight to Him as we go through each season.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17

Life-long Lessons from a Short Trip

We recently spent a week in Guatemala at the Eagle's Nest Children's Home on a short term mission trip. My husband Ken, myself, and our two oldest children; Allison and Joel were part of a mission team from our church, along with 24 other people. It was a great trip for many reasons.

We went really not knowing what to expect as far as the mission trip experience. We had met as a team monthly for several months but only really knew about 3 other people prior to the trip. Our team had spent some time going through part of John Piper's book, Let the Nations Be Glad. This book gets your mind thinking about the purpose of missions.

We learned as a team that flexibility is the best plan and that worked very well. As a mom of six I am learning to be flexible, I recognize that often my frustration with my children comes when my expectations have been perhaps a little unrealistic. (There are other times when my expectations are just fine.)

As we worked on some projects for Eagle's Nest we had opportunity to work alongside people we didn't know very well. Painting at the soccer field gave some of us time to get to know each other better. One morning after failing at our attempt to sing :) we decided to share our stories of how we came to a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. It was a great encouragement and helped us to understand where we had come from. It was interesting to me that several of us really came to a crossroads in our christian walk in college and that had solidified our faith. What a need for campus ministries like Campus Crusade for Christ, Inter-Varsity Christian Fellowship, and Navigators.

Three afternoons we spent time at a public school doing an outreach, much like a short version of Vacation Bible School. It was a great time of meeting some of the children, seeing how some things are the same no matter where the children live, and sharing our faith with them. Children are wonderful and so welcoming!

Of course we spent a lot of time helping in the children's home, too. When we first walked in it was a little overwhelming, there were about 80 children at that time. We jumped in where there was a crying babe, read in our best Spanish to a toddler (they didn't seem to notice if I pronounced a word wrong), played peek-a-boo and other impromptu games. What a joy to hold a little one until they fell asleep and than find another that could use some more attention. One little girl has some special needs and each time someone would seek her out and spend time with her. It was a privilege to fill a gap for a mama that was working with someone else or for an adoptive parent far away. Some moments I wished I had more arms to hold another.

Our time at the children's home reminded me of how thankful I am for the other adults in our children's lives such as: family friends, our Family Pastor and his Assistant, small group and AWANA leaders, and Sunday School teachers, to name a few. These adults help to fill the gaps we as parents have. We so enjoy watching our children interact with others. As we watched our two oldest really be part of our mission team I was so thankful for the work the Lord was doing in their lives.

There are many things that the Lord is continuing to show me from this trip. I pray that I would continue to be teachable.

"I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living." Psalm 27:13

W-A-I-T-I-N-G

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,' declares the Lord. 'As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.'" -Isaiah 55:8-9

On my own I am not a patient person. So today, the last day of the "possibly two weeks until we receive a new referral", has been somewhat emotional because we are still waiting. I think that the hardest part of adoption, whether it is domestic or international, is the waiting.

You wait to get the home study, you wait for the dossier paperwork, you wait for the referral, you wait as you go through each step of the process. It feels like you are always waiting and in my limited thinking I have been side-tracked into thinking that I have been waiting on a child.

I was looking through a devotional** we have and I came across some good reminders, I have listed a few of them below:

*You aren't waiting on man, you are waiting on God.

*God is not bound by geography, timelines, politics or finances.

*God hasn't asked you to walk this path alone. Not only will He remain with you each step of the way, He has prepared many warriors to go into battle with you.

*God's gifts to us are never late; they are always on time and far beyond what we could ever imagine.

When expecting our first child I would lament that the baby sure was taking a long time and my mom would say, "Babies are never late, they come at just the right time." Adoption is like that as well. We have waited for adoptions to occur before, and they are not always speedy, but the Lord has blessed us greatly not only in the end but in the process.

Ken handles waiting much better than I. Please pray for me that I would wait upon the Lord and that I would not waste this time of waiting but use it to draw closer to the Lord.

**Hope for the Journey:an adoption companion; created by Shaohannah's Hope

What is Your Passion?

A few years ago we went out to lunch with another family after church, at this time we had four children. It was a time in our family's life when we weren't really sure where we belonged and what the Lord had for us to do. As we ate, the husband we were dining with asked us, "What is your passion?" It was one of those dry times, we really didn't know the answer. But I couldn't get that question out of my mind. Surely we were passionate about something. Ken and I would talk about it off and on, but didn't really have any deep discussion about it.

As time went on we felt that the Lord was leading us to resume foster parenting and as we did we felt that we came to life. To reach out and touch a child's life even for a short time, to be able to show them Jesus as we went through our daily lives- how exciting! As we got back into the swing of fostering it was not necessarily with the idea of adoption, though part of me hoped that would happen. We really just wanted to fill a gap for a child when they were going through difficulty. As it turned out we would permanently fill the gap for two more children. We had found our passion!

We are passionate about our family and about adoption. We have wondered how the Lord chose us to be a part of His plan for these children. It is truly humbling to bring a child into our home, even more so when we are not the birthparents. God has put together our family and we love it! The Lord has grown that passion deep in our hearts.

In the Bible God speaks of the orphan over 60 times, He is passionate about the orphan. Below are a few of my favorites:

"Defend the cause of the weak and the fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed." Psalm 82:3

"learn to do right! Seek justice, encourage the oppressed. Defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow." Isaiah 1:17

"For I was hungry and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in. I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me. Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?' The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' Matthew 25:35-40

Walking with a Toddler

(Not wanting to leave today on a sad note)... I am trying to increase the amount of exercise I get, I need to. For some time Ken and I have gotten up and walked in the morning but we have gotten out of the habit with the heat and our recent trip.

I decided that I would walk without him, so after he had left for work I went downstairs to sneak out before the day got too crazy. As I went through the kitchen Brandon (4) saw me and asked if he could go with me. At first I thought no, but we had been gone for a week and I thought it would be an opportunity to multi-task; spend time with Brandon and get a little exercise. Brandon ran to put some clothes on and get his shoes.

I met him outside and looked at his feet seeing that he had put on his flip-flops: he loves his flip-flops! Thinking, not too clearly early in the day, what can it hurt if he wears them, we began our walk.

Past the first house, he had a rock in his "shoe"-we stop. A couple of houses later one of his flip-flops come off-we stop. "Is that a toad, mom?"-we stop. I think you get the picture. At this point I am getting a little frustrated. Why didn't I get up earlier? Why didn't I say no to having a walking partner? Why can't we just keep moving?

As these thoughts came to my mind I felt a nudging in my heart. There was a lesson here to learn but not for Brandon. The Lord used much of our walk to remind me that He asks me to walk with Him everyday and sometimes my walk is not at the pace the Lord is wanting. At times I let the busyness in my day set the pace. I need to start my day in God's Word because that is where I get my marching orders for today.

The Lord has fitted my feet with the "readiness that comes from the gospel of peace" (Ephesians 6:15)-not only do I have the perfect shoes, I am ready to walk. Yet, I allow "rocks" in my shoes to stop me along the way. Somedays I hesitate, looking at other things going on around me at times at the cost of watching where I am walking. I have the perfect walking partner when I am walking closely with the Lord.

I thought I needed physical exercise but really I needed a gentle reminder to stay close to my Lord each day, watching what He is pointing out to me along the way. I need to be even more excited to spend time with the Lord than Brandon was to take a walk with me, anxious to see what the Lord will show me along His path.

As for physical exercise, I'll have to go another time.

Pictures of Grace Paola

(right) My favorite picture of Grace,

taken May 2007.

Picture taken July 1, 2007

Grace is being held by Ashley - a friend we have met in this process.

Here is a poem that an adoptive mom sent to me, someone had sent it to her after the loss of their little child.

Then I remember that you [God] wait and wonder…
longing for your adopted children to be in your arms...
gazing into your eyes, hearing your love songs....
Suddenly, I know how you feel God…
that constriction of the heart that causes pain to the depths of the soul.
And I know that my pain is more godly than anything in my life has ever
been.
For once, my heart is like your heart. And this holy pain leads me to
my knees...
to thank you for the wait…
And to pray for all the babies that need to come home…
Yours and mine.

-author unknown

Our Little Grace Paola

At the end of March we heard of a little tiny girl waiting for a family. After talking with the agency and much prayer we decided to accept the referral for our little Grace Paola on April 5, 2007. She had come to the home with some medical problems that could be resolved and had difficulty sucking. She was tiny 4# 15 oz., 4 days old and she had no hair. She was growing very slowly, some months hardly at all and so we would pray for her to grow and develop.

In June she was admitted to the hospital with dehydration due to an illness. Many people prayed for her. Grace and our family were blessed by the many people who lifted her to the Lord in prayer. She was in the hospital for 6 days and returned to the children's home. Still very delicate she improved a little at a time.

On July 7 Grace was admitted to the hospital due to illness, we received that phone call about 4 pm in the afternoon. They were unsure at that time what the problem was. Ken and I had a date that evening and had some great time together. We also had a very serious conversation about what our response would be if Grace did not recover. We feel that the Lord prepared us for the near future.

July 9 was the beginning of VBS (a great week, by the way). When we returned home that first day there was a message to call the agency. My first thought was this was not going to be good news. Grace Paola had gone home to be with the Lord between 10-10:30 am that day. She had had pneumonia, we were to find out later. Below I have posted the letter that we sent to our family and friends who had prayed so diligently for Grace, knowing that they would then lift our family in prayer as we grieved for Grace.

Hello friends,

We want to thank you for praying for little Grace and for our family lately. It is with sad hearts that we need to tell you that dear Grace went home to be with the Lord earlier today. She had been admitted to the hospital Saturday afternoon because she had stopped eating and was coughing. At this time we do not have any more details. When the call came from the Children's Home to our agency they were so upset that they could not relay the details to them.

We would like to share just a couple of thoughts with you. First, we know and are certain that the Lord is in control of all things. And we know that He loved Grace more perfectly than we would ever be capable of. We know that He has heard the prayers for this precious little one and that He answered it as He knew best. We prayed for healing and He has healed her and welcomed her into His loving arms.

The Lord was also preparing us. We have known for a while that her health was fragile. Just last night Ken and I spent some time out discussing how we would handle this very thing. We talked about how we would tell the children (we didn't have a well laid out plan for this), we talked about how we were learning from this experience about relying upon the Lord, and we talked about where we would go from here in the event Grace was not able to come home.

At this time, it is our plan to continue with an adoption from Eagle's Nest. The more we learn about the mission of Eagle's Nest the more excited we become about the work they do there for the orphans in Guatemala. Through this morning we were praying that Grace Paola would be able to come home to us. Tonight we are assured that she was welcomed into the arms of Jesus.

Again we ask for you to pray for our family as we grieve. Pray especially for our children as they come to understand this loss. There hearts are very welcoming and they were looking forward to Grace being a part of our family. Please pray also for the Mama's at Eagle's Nest as these ladies care so completely for these little ones, today their hearts are heavy.

Thank you for your care for Grace Paola and our family. Thank you so much for being an encouragement to us along this path. We trust that your lives have been blessed by praying for this precious little girl. We know that our lives were blessed by knowing her from a distance.